The title: If you don't have anything nice to say about twin parenting... keep your mouth SHUT, and other unsolicited advice, seemed a bit long, but that is what this post really should be called.
If you've ever shared with someone that through fertility treatments you may be BLESSED with multiples, been pregnant with multiples or had the pleasure of giving birth to multiples you've surely heard some comments about what your life will undoubtedly be like. Some of these comments will have come from people who've parented twins and some will come from people trying to 'help' who really have no idea what they are talking about. In both situations, the ass-vice is generally not super helpful.
I heard a lot of this while I was still pregnant with the boys. I usually just took it with a smile and walked away giving it very little thought. My first dose of post-pregnancy twin 'wisdom' came from the OB who discharged me from the hospital. When she came into my room on that Saturday morning, her first comment was 'are you sure you want to go home?' After we assured her that we were ready, she proceeded to lay out for me how my life was over. You see, she herself has twins, so she surely knows exactly what life if going to look like for us. Not only did she share that her twins have NEVER gotten any easier and they are now 2.5 years old, but also that I'd likely never sleep again. She told me that she 'usually' is still happy she had them. I know some of what she said was in jest, but what ever happened to building each other up as mothers? I'm the first to admit that I appreciate some honesty- even when it isn't what I'd like to hear, but to stand there and tell a woman who is preparing to take her twins home how HORRIBLE it is going to be? Probably not super helpful.
I'm thankful that my attitude toward having twins has always been- I may have my hands full, but my heart will be equally full. I can't even imagine how defeated I would have felt if I wasn't able to listen to her and laugh as she left the room.
Let this be a reminder to both myself and to you... If you can't encourage (or occasionally commiserate) with another mother, just keep your mouth shut.